Inverted Canines

2008 August 12

For my 2nd Thursday Thirteen a 13×13 poem. For Totally Optional Prompts three poems in one for ‘Three Dogs’.

chronic fatigue rules waking life deeply with aches into fabric of my being
pain never recedes but ebbs and swells despite still face showing stoic
hurts to move even more to think and devise needed changes
even wild and urgent desires rarely rouse my temper much
when vivid images don’t match the smoldering fire within
doing nothing becomes the norm for good reason
little steps loom large and feel hopeful
that gives brief passion and energy
now dimming only to flicker
every day that passes
night follows soon
always so
tired

*************************************************************

The structure of this poem began as an idea for Thursday Thirteen. Thirteen lines of poetry devised into thirteen words descending to one. But adding the Totally Optional Prompt of ‘Three Dogs’ got me thinking about being dog tired. So I created two more poems within this design.

First I wrote the word ‘tired’, then the two word line above that, then the three word line and the four word line. Then I wrote the words ‘chronic fatigue’ and wrote the thirteen word line. Next was the twelve word line and then the eleven word line.

I then finished the two poems within the main body. I added the words on the left margin to complete a descending thirteen word poem and then on the right margin as well. The last portion I wrote was the lines of ten words, then nine, eight, seven, six and five.

This explanation is to tell you that I am feeling extremely run down this week and barely getting through the work day. As much as enjoy reading and commentating on your blogs, I am taking at least the rest of this week off to rest. I may or may not have a Rockin’ Chair Writers Prompt #7 this Friday; if not, it will be next Monday at the earliest before I post again. As always, emails are welcome.

Love y’all.

31 Responses leave one →
  1. 2008 August 12

    Rest! We’ll wait for you. Take care of yourself and stay healthy.

  2. 2008 August 12

    hope your life starts moving in the opposite direction from the decline into exhaustion captured here… but take your time – we’ll still be here when you get back!

  3. 2008 August 12

    That’s a great poem! Is this your own structure, or something “established” among poets? Are there any other rules beyond the word count per line?

  4. 2008 August 12

    Love the structure also. Feel better :)

    I’m signing the contract tomorrow–it’s been a long long six months and am mentally and physically exhausted also. I will probably blog 3 times in the next seven-eight weeks–and hopefully by 10/1 I will be able to begin my newest version of my life

  5. 2008 August 13

    You’d need a rest after working that one out anyway :-)

    Take it easy, now, my friend.

  6. 2008 August 13

    I like this, Brian. It conveys the feeling so well.

    I hope you are feeling more lively soon!

  7. 2008 August 13

    A quick comment to say thanks. I went home from work this afternoon. I have a three day weekend coming up.

    Love y’all.

  8. 2008 August 13

    Great choice for TT!!! Hope I can ask a favor… Please vote for me…. I was nominated for pinoyworld blog of the week, voting poll located at my sidebar… Thanks a lot! Happy TT!

  9. 2008 August 13

    Most excellent. You have captured the exact feeling I am experiencing this moment, Brian. Thanks.

  10. 2008 August 13

    Very creative! I enjoyed this entry :)

  11. 2008 August 13

    I’m very impressed by this Brian. I can’t poet to save my life – and this is brilliant! Good for you! :)

  12. 2008 August 13

    Impressive!

    SJR
    The Pink Flamingo

  13. 2008 August 14

    clever poem! Have a good rest!

  14. 2008 August 14

    This happens to me every summer. I think I’ve only written maybe five new poems since June. But I need the rest and relaxation to recharge my batteries. You recharge yours, too! Happy rest!

  15. 2008 August 14

    Very cool. I will try this at some point.

    Happy TT

    B @ The Love Blog

  16. 2008 August 14

    Neat form – looks like a lot of work – being tired usually means it would be a good thing to rest! Take care!!!

  17. 2008 August 14
    nickersandink permalink

    So well done!

  18. 2008 August 14

    Great poem and great form. Very unique.

  19. 2008 August 14

    Interesting combination of tasks for your T-13 today. I’m glad I happened by and wish you well. One thing I learned about living with chronic fatigue is that taking time off to rest when tired is essential.
    Hugs and blessings,

  20. 2008 August 14

    Great subject for the style – kind of reminds me of the excited chatter that dwindles to barely audible mumbles as my son, tired after a hard day playing, reports to me as he’s falling asleep.

  21. 2008 August 14

    There’s something sparkly for you at my place :)

    Have a wonderful and relaxing weekend.

  22. 2008 August 14

    Hey Brian,
    I’ve not been blog-visiting much lately, but so glad to see you were at my place today.
    I hope the fatigue dims and energy starts to flicker for you again.

  23. 2008 August 14

    wow awesome format requiring lots of thought.. amazing how one can pack a punch in words… it’s as if i can see your emotional energy draining… it is a worthy effort and thank you for sharing… especially appreciate your thoughtful comments opening a door to yr house… thrz nothing like resting in every breath and watching the moments pass unheeded…

  24. 2008 August 15

    i love how it looks like a canine

    sorry you’re feeling dog tired but at least it inspired you to produce this!

  25. 2008 August 15

    Numbers! I love them and they are encoded in my poems. Nice work.

  26. 2008 August 15

    well for someone that is feeling a bit under the weather you sure jumped thru some hoops to create this poem… and it is lovely as well i might add….

  27. 2008 August 15

    Wow…great poem and fantastic format too. Thank you for explaining how you wrote this and your motivation behind it. I know it is far more personal than you say in your explanation.

    I hope you can get some decent rest and recharge your batteries.

    -Bev

  28. 2008 August 16

    http://hummingbunny.wordpress.com/2008/08/16/tropical-storm-fay-florida/

    We’ll be paying very close attention to Tropical Storm Fay, soon to be Hurricane Fay this weekend and early next week. The link to the post above will be updated for the next four days.

  29. 2008 August 16

    Brian my love, but this is wonderful. I have missed so much. I love the way you formed this poem and use your own tiredness with the theme of being “dog tired”. Rest my dearest, nothing is more important than your health and state of mind. A writer cannot work on empty. BTW, I have missed you all. Can you sen me your new phone #? My email is
    Beloved49@gmail.com. Hope to hear from you all.

    you ya, Melanie

  30. 2008 August 18

    So cool, the manner in which you wrote it. I know you are great at this, but it had to have used up some of that energy! But then maybe the successful completion energized as well.

  31. 2008 August 28

    So very cool. I so understand…

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